My special guest brought
the house down on Friday night’s radio show. Unlike the moribund selections of
guests past, Carole Innes brought with her some right ear blasters to awaken those
slumbering in their Mearns’ homes and the landlord of the pub next door came
round to tell us the optics were getting shaken off the shelves.
I didn’t think
much of my guest’s bodyguard mind you. We’d refused to provide security, despite
her agent’s demands in the days leading up to the show, so she brought her own,
an unshaven chap somewhere in his late fifties, clearly in need of a salad and
a good bath. Thankfully the paparazzi didn’t provide us any bother because if
we’d had to call upon her bodyguard I doubt he’d have landed a punch, the bloke
couldn’t have knocked the skin off a rice pudding.
The provision of security hadn’t
been Carole’s only demand either, you hear about these divas don’t you and
their unreasonable expectations? I’d thought rather better of her and expected her
rider to be more modest than the one she came up with; a case of Stella,
a family size box of Ferrero Rocher, enough red roses to fill Hampden and the
provision of an after show Chippendale in the green room. She wasn’t at all
happy when she discovered we’d only provided a can of Asda’s own cola and a
Twix. There’s no pleasing some people. And when she discovered she’d need to
provide her own pen to deal with the autograph hunters, she threw an unsightly
tantrum I can tell you.
Thankfully,
Carole’s daughter Kirsty and her friend Mia saved the day. They’d come along to
keep her company but ended up becoming stars of the show, introducing a couple
of tracks, telling us about their dancing prowess and in Kirsty’s case,
describing her remarkable achievement being selected for an Under 12’s district
football squad. Their calm broadcasting skills restored some much needed order
to proceedings.
The five of us had
a terrific evening with lots of laughs. Carole told the listeners of her
(wholly innocent) evening with Liam Gallagher at the Marcliffe, her love of
rock music and devotion to Aberdeen FC. I tried to tempt her over to the ranks
of AVFC supporters but she was having none of it. Her song choices were
excellent except for the last one which was so awful I refused to play it (some
random Queen album track) and her confidence on air suggests to me that this
won’t be the last time we hear her broadcasting to the nation.
So thank you
Carole, Mike, Kirsty & Mia for a very enjoyable evening. Aberdeen’s 4-0
demolition of Stranraer the following afternoon I hope capped a fine weekend
for you (Villa’s surrender of a two goal lead to Preston North End certainly
did nothing for mine.)
Carole’s selections
1.
Master
Of Puppets – Metallica
2.
She
Sells Sanctuary – The Cult
3.
Highway
To Hell – AC/DC
4.
Rock n
Roll Star – Oasis
5.
Keep
On Loving You – Reo Speedwagon
