They’d snuck down the A90 from Aberdeen to share Amy’s favourite songs and a good time was had by all, despite the irritating distraction of a Neil Diamond & Johnny Cash tribute act performing in the adjacent room, we broadcast from within Stonehaven Town Hall you see. On any other night I might have bought a ticket but instead we found ourselves serenaded by Ring Of Fire and Forever In Blue Jeans while attempting to share meaningful conversation. I’ll be writing a strongly worded letter to the management and no mistake.
Amy has an architectural drawing business called PaQ Design, those few words alone filling me with a deep sense of inadequacy since I couldn’t even draw a stick man. She spends her days designing new interiors for private and business premises, have a gander right here for the full story. Thankfully, given I am to hoarding what Birmingham City are to class, she’s more than capable of satisfying the demands of us minimalists so a redesign of my shoebox of a gaff is not beyond her, I’ll be in touch. We exchanged pleasantries and established that Amy and Andrew had lived, until relatively recently, in that monumental goldfish bowl people refer to as ‘London’, then tucked into her musical choices which, while providing rich pickings, sadly culminated in a lamentable stinker.
There are two golden rules in community radio; 1) no profanity, and 2) no politics. The second of these we honoured without issue but the first found Amy endeavouring to throw me under a bus, selecting no less than three songs which carried expletives. Thankfully I’m a broadcaster of considerable repute so had the foresight to play her selections to myself earlier in the day, I therefore prepared radio edit versions otherwise this would be the last show I ever broadcasted. Amy Winehouse provided the opening number and flippin’ Bruno Mars the last, a reprehensible selection with which to end, the only saving grace being that the 10 o’clock Sky News kicked in to sabotage it halfway through.
The jewel in the crown though was a terrific number recorded by The Prophets back in 1966. The drummer, Stuart Geddis, is Amy’s uncle and the band were lined up for great things but, like so many good bands, they didn’t break through to the big time. So what though? Thanks to the internet we still have access to nuggets such as this which we can replay to our hearts content and I recommend you give the track a whirl too, just click here, The Prophets.
Before I sign off with a full list of Amy’s six chosen tracks, it’d be remiss of me not to hurl pelters in the direction of her fiancé, Andrew. Despite being in all other regards a gentleman of integrity and kindness, unquestionably devoted to his wife-to-be, here stands an emperor with no clothes, a charlatan, a turncoat and a fraud. Be warned Amy, you’re marrying a glory hunter, an individual who rather than offering support to his local provincial football club, chooses instead to latch onto the repugnant Manchester United and until you address this elephant in the room, I believe your impending marriage ought to be put on ice. No offence, but you owe it to yourself and your family to demand a written explanation from this man before you exchange your wedding vows. In this explanation, he must describe how, despite hailing from Buckie on the Moray Firth, he’s prepared to nail his colours to the Manchester United mast. And while you’re at it, ask him which club denied his the domestic treble at Wembley in 1994 😁👌.
Amy’s Selections
Amy Winehouse – Tears Dry on Their Own
Kings of Leon – Fans
Gregory Porter - Holding On
The Phantoms – Since I Lost my Baby
Childish Gambino – Redbone
Bruno Mars – Locked Out of Heaven
