I suppose I ought to begin by wishing you a happy New Year
and all that. I’m not sure if this obligatory greeting refers purely to Hogmanay
or the entire year, either way I half-heartedly wish it to you. I don’t really
do New Year, I never have. How’s that for an upbeat opening!
What are your hopes and fears for 2017? My hopes are simple,
there are three. 1) Bob Dylan lives long enough to perform for me at the SEC in
May, no guarantee there given the procession of high profile deaths in recent
months. 2) Aston Villa grapple their way through the play-offs for an instant
return to the premiership, by no means an expectation, just a hope. 3) I get a
book published, a long time ambition and it’s about time it was realised. As for fears, well look no further than the new President of
the USA. To think that a guy like Trump will be the leader of the free world is
frankly terrifying. I’m fearful too that my back pain won’t allow me to play
golf, perhaps not as major a fear as the Trump farrago but important to me
nonetheless.
But enough about me, let’s talk about my special guest on last
night’s Stoney Baloney radio show, Patrick Wood, who was terrific company. I
allow guests 6 of their favourite tracks, a dangerous business given I’m a
music snob but Patrick didn’t let me down, opening with a satisfactory
Razorlight track and following up with The Eagles and Oasis. So far so good,
but unforgiveably, he’d allowed his younger brother Elliot to select the last
two songs and that’s when it all went pear shaped. On came two tracks which can
best be described as hollow, mainstream pap and it was all I could do not to
drag them off air halfway through. Mercifully I exorcised this double barrelled
nightmare by playing the show out with Ace Of Spades by Motorhead and we could
all breathe again.
We learned a few things about Patrick; he was born in Southern
California and moved to Auchenblae (thirty degrees cooler) with his family when
he was four. A dozen years later here they still are. Patrick plays piano,
keyboards, a bit of guitar, makes me jealous that, I can’t even play the spoons
and studies at Mearns Academy (I say ‘studies’, perhaps I should merely be saying ‘attends’). His American twang has never left him and his claim to fame
is American based too, though an utterly feeble one. I still maintain that
playing toy cars for ten minutes with the young son of a Lakers basketball
player and not actually conversing with said basketball player (Denis Rodman) directly,
does not represent a genuine claim to fame. I walked past Buckingham Palace
once, does that mean I’ve met the Queen? Nope.
Great to have you along Patrick, hopefully you’ll be
presenting on Mearns FM yourself sometime soon. To you I wish a genuinely happy
New Year.
Patrick’s selections
1.
America – Razorlight
2.
Hotel California – The Eagles
3.
Long Road To Ruin – Foo Fighters
4.
Wonderwall – Oasis
5.
Am I Wrong – Nico & Vinz
6.
Flight – Tristam & Braken
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