I welcomed a splendid guest last Friday, local beautician Paula Young (although she took one look at me and claimed I was beyond repair. ‘You can put lipstick on a pig but it’s still a pig’ she said. Bloody charming.)
Regrettably, while Paula herself proved good company, she brought with her a gimp by the name of Keith Douglas, her latest squeeze. He’d been in touch through the week, bigging himself up as her agent and falsely leading me to believe she was a hairdresser not a beautician. I diligently prepared, therefore, a playlist of hair related tracks; Devil’s Haircut, Jesus Hairdo, Haircut 100 etc, only for them to prove futile. I had egg all over my face as Douglas sat in the corner of the studio grinning like a Cheshire cat while I ploughed through ill titled tracks, but he’ll get his comeuppance don’t worry about that.
Paula chose her six memorable songs, mercifully resisting the urge to choose a song by her (nearly) namesake Paul Young, opening instead with a merry Dolly Parton number, although it struggled to be heard above the din emanating from the town hall main stage a few yards away. The Chandeliers, a good but ear splittingly loud band, were mid-gig and taking the roof off, we really must get our radio studio sound proofed. Paula’s next selection, McFly, suffered a similar fate but let’s face it, it’s indeed a blessing when any of their songs are drowned out, even with one of Douglas’s guttural farts.
It’s kinda tough presenting a show but allowing guests to choose their own music. I’m something of a music snob and find certain artists insufferable, almost unplayable, so I have been known to refuse certain selections. Frankly this is something I need to get over, you wouldn’t invite someone for dinner and refuse the bottle of wine they’d brought, it’s just plain rude, but surely it’s beholden upon each guest to at least bring some faintly listenable material with them? There are some weeks when white noise would be preferable to the guff they serve up.
Any road up, thankyou to Paula for being a very pleasant guest, our conversation more than counter balancing her questionable music selections and those of her daughter Skye. You’re welcome back anytime Paula, but remember to leave your agent behind next time.
Paula’s Selections
- Coat Of Many Colours - Dolly Parton
- If You Think I’m Sexy - Rod Stewart
- It’s All About You - McFly
- The Most Beautiful Girl - Charlie Rich
- Smile - Uncle Kraker
- Glasgow Star - Eddie Reader
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